Happy 1st Birthday Westley

Happy 1st Birthday to our Sweet Westley London!

It is so hard to believe that our little nugget has been with us a year exactly today.  It truly is a day of celebrating having him in our lives. But to me it's also a day to celebrate the fact that we are all still alive and survived this first year together!  We had no idea, I mean no idea, how drastically different our lives would be.  Brad and I used to talk with all our friends about things we would NEVER do once he came along and I now know they were listening sweetly, but in their minds saying, "these two have no idea what is about to hit them." And BOY WERE THEY RIGHT!!!!

We do everything we said we wouldn't do; but I'm okay with it. It's worth it.  Totally worth all of it. 

Since West has come into our lives, I feel like I am a TOTALLY different person. Quite often, I hear that I have shocked more than just a few people by the way West has radically altered my life.  I rarely have time to just sit and think about it, I'm too busy living it.  But if I was to just list a few things, it would look something like this:
I used to be so organized and manage major events.  Now, I sing Old McDonald about a million times a day and have gotten exceptionally good at the peek-a-boo game.  Getting 9 to 10 hours of sleep was something I did on a regular basis and having a clean house was the norm.  Now I'm lucky to catch 7 to 8 hours (which I know is a blessing), but I'm ALWAYS tired.  I'm still shocked at myself that I quit my job, but I did not quit working.  My new job is now being a stay at home mom and the hours are ridiculous.  I used to feel like I had some sense of fashion, but now anything with a drawstring will do just fine because it's going to get a stain on it at some point in the day.  I used to feel like I somewhat had control in my life and my sassy personality has crumbled into a hot mess of blubbering hormones.  The list could go on, but I don't want to bore you.  And to be honest, he's worth everything I have given up and makes life more fun than I ever dreamed.

I still remember one morning so vividly walking into his room, seeing that sweet smile sweep across that precious baby face.  In that moment, I realized I love this little guy more than I could ever have imagined and I have been changed forever, for good.

I'm not going to sugar coat it.  Becoming a mom and keeping a child alive for one year has been the hardest job I have ever taken on in my entire life.  It's hard. Some days I hated it. The crying, the feeding every 3 hours, barely sleeping, and not having one minute to myself.  But now that I have crossed from the darkness of those first few months into this wonderful stage of chasing each other down the hall, babbling and growling back and forth at one another, and watching this very strong willed personality develop, I'm loving it.  The days are still long and tiresome, but they are filled with so many sweet moments and sweet kisses, even sometimes without being asked.

Well, I think you can tell I love being a mother.  Coming from a girl who wasn't even sure she wanted to have kids, I can honestly say I would have missed out so much on this life.  The laughs and tears that Brad and I have shared over this little man have brought us so much closer and our relationship is so much sweeter.

Besides my relationship with God, and Bradley - West is the best thing to ever happen to me. I feel like God used him to help soften my heart. To learn to really love and to teach me that I am not in control.  I love him unconditionally, absolutely, no matter what he does.  (Brad calls this...Grace)

So Westley, thank you for the best year of our lives.  Happy Birthday my sweet little boy!

I will say though, as much as I hated being asked when we would have kids,  I will loathe even more the person that dares ask me when we will have another.  Unless you are willing to quit your job, help out everyday with everything and move in with us to be able to help take care of more children, just keep your sweet comments to yourself.

The Sweetest Sound

For months I have been hearing "da-da" and I have been so happy for Bradley.  But..... I can't lie, I have been so ready to hear those sweet little lips say "ma-ma."  And that day finally came a week ago.  While sitting in our family room at church, ever so randomly I heard the syllables I have been dying to hear.  It brought tears to my eyes and was a sweet moment.  I was so glad Bradley was in there with us to witness it. 

It's taken a few days to capture it again, but tonight, I was finally able to. So enjoy!

Let the New Year Begin

Happy New Year 2012

Yes, we are a few weeks delayed, but that's how things role around here these days.  2012....I'm very excited about this year coming up.  This time last year I was so anxious and had no idea what to expect with the arrival of our little nugget.  I could have never dreamed how much my life would change.  (My next post will be about all those fun and crazy changes)  But looking towards this year, I am excited to be sleeping again and to be able to do so many new, fun things with Westley now that he is on the move and getting so much bigger.

It's a sweet thing these days since Westley has become mobile to be able to just sit still and play for a little while.  So over the holiday break we really enjoyed our play time having Bradley at home with us.  And this picture captures just one of so many favorite memories of this past holiday.  It's just the simple ones, our little family of three playing together!

Here's a couple new things West has been up to since we rang in the new year:

 We are still slowly working on introducing finger food to Westley.  And I think you can see that black beans have become a favorite to our little man.

This one is just showing off how cute he keeps getting each day.  These sweet onesies are my favorite!

Westley is a very affirmed child.  We always clap after he has done something well, to let him know what a great job he has done and he's just so cute doing something new.  So now because we've done it so much, he even claps for himself. 

 Some of our dearest friends taught their little girl some words through sign language at West's age so we decided to try it.  It took West a few months to learn the first one:  "more."  But over the last two weeks we have introduced "please" and just in the last few days he picked it up so fast and it's` just precious.  He stands next to some of his toys and gives us the please sign because he's ready to play.  It's just amazing to be able to communicate with him like this and just downright precious to see him do it.

West got some of the most fabulous new toys for Christmas.  But go figure, this homemade wagon has been his favorite to be carted around the house in. 

He keeps us busy and on our toes, but it's worth every minute of it.  So now, the countdown begins until our baby boy is 1. 

A Girl's Only Post

Before you read any further, if you are a male, you might not want to continue reading as today's topic is breastfeeding. So just know, you have been warned. 

The day for starting to wean Westley from breastfeeding has finally come and the emotions that I'm going through have come as quite a shock.  Before Westley was born, I really didn't have a strong feeling one way or the other as to whether I would breastfeed or bottle feed.  I thought I would give it a try, but if it didn't work out, I wasn't going to be heartbroken.  As those first few sleepless weeks got underway, he took to it very quickly even though it took forever for him to eat.  I had heard so many friends say "stick with it for 6 weeks before you make your mind up."  So that's what I decided to do.

There were definitely some very hard days and weeks.  I thought a couple times about giving it up, but I decided to continue to push through it.  It's a complete 100% commitment.  I have found that fewer and fewer women do it. Now please know I don't in any way judge anyone that doesn't.  I think it's a personal choice. However, I have not appreciated being judged myself.  And throughout the last few months at times I have been made to feel like a crazy, hippie for doing it.  At times it has been very inconvenient but I have also had to get creative sometimes.  I have fed him in the back of the car and been stopped by mall security, fed him on a public bathroom toilet, and have mastered the art of pumping and driving in order to save time!  So it's been quite an adventure and I thought I would be rejoicing when the time actually came to starting weaning him.

But just like everything else that has shocked me about being a mom, I have been surprised at how sad I am to be giving it up.  I thought I would be thrilled with the freedom it finally brought.  I have gone from feeding him 8 times a day to 4 times a day.  But in those first few months I was spending 7/8 hours a day feeding him, starring at his precious little face.  Those were the moments/hours that we really got to know each other over this last year.  During that time, I watched each new facial expression that he was developing, I watched his eyelashes grow in, sometimes he would just stare at me until I would smile at him, at times he wanted to hold my hand, and after he is done even now he just lays there and giggles and babble new syllables that he is learning.  So it became a time that was about more than just feeding, but it was "our time," just me and him nothing else in the world mattered.  And although in my heart I know it's time, it's still very hard.  My little boy is becoming a big boy.  But gosh, I am more than thankful that I stuck with it and have some sweet memories that I will always cherish.